Parenting

PARENTING STRATEGIES FOR DIFFICULT CHILDREN

Parenting, in most cases comes naturally, it’s an inborn instinct. However there are stressful situations that arise in a parent’s life that call for help from friends, family and outside resources. Especially, those parents who deal with difficult children.

Here are some strategies to help with those children:

Show your appreciation

Oftentimes, kids get told of the bad or wrong things that they say or do. Too much of this can lead to low self-esteem, and maybe even depression. Find the good things they do on a daily basis, and make them aware that you’re happy with what they’ve done, and let them know that you’re always proud of them. Even if it’s something as little as taking out the trash, or putting their dirty dishes in the sink. A little praise goes a long, long way, but by the same token, don’t overdo the praise, balance it with the reprimands.

Choose your battles

If you have an angry child on your hands, let them know they can say what’s on their mind and the only way you can help them is for them to express their anger, as long as it’s verbal only. Even if they shout at you, don’t shout back, this only fuels their fire. Calmly take all the lashing out, and then offer them comfort, praise for lack of violent physical contact, and suggestions for how they can be helped. If they need a daily place to vent, offer them a journal to express their anger, they can say what they want, how they want, and with no backlash, it’s a great stress reliever. This often helps, if you want to see what they write…ALWAYS ASK, don’t invade their privacy, and respect it when they don’t want to share it.

Avoid negotiations

Try to avoid negotiating while dealing with difficult children. It gives them the upper hand in some situations. Let them know, bargaining is not an option, and you will not bend.

Stand strong

All children, not just difficult ones will push buttons and see what they can get away with, or try to pull tricks on their parents. Difficult children will be especially crafty in these tricks. If you lay ground rules for something, NEVER falter, or allow just once, children NEVER forget. You must stand firm, if you don’t, not only are you setting yourself up for disaster in the child rearing department, it also confuses the child.

Talk about the consequences

Let them know what the consequences will be if they do something wrong. Take away privileges and maybe a prized possession until a certain specified time. Something unpleasant, but nothing dangerous, will usually deter future undesired behaviors.

 

Hopefully, these parenting strategies will help you in dealing with difficult children, and also build a healthy relationship with these children.

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